Moments
by We'reAllInsomniacs
Summary: A collection of oneshots centering around Renji and Rukia, taking a glimpse at the what-could-have-beens and what-should-have-beens between our favourite redhead and our main heroine. These are their moments. RenRuki


Wow, it's been a while.

I've been more than a little out of the Bleach loop for the past year, but RenRuki will remain, to me, my OTP. I've been reading bits and pieces of the manga just to update myself on the Bleach happenings, but I think I've retracted my foot out of the fandom for the most part.

I can't really write up-to-date Bleach fics (lol), so I'll just take the easy way out and present to you what could have happened during the transition between the two major arcs. Or in short, just my wishful thinking to try and make RenRuki canon.

It's a little melodramatic. But I've made the ending humorous, because, well, it's RenRuki.

Disclaimer: I'm just a fan.

* * *

It was a beautiful Saturday, sunny with a hint of a cool breeze. Renji squinted and looked to the sky – a clear blue with a few cloudy wisps here and there. Despite the turmoil that was currently churning within Soul Society and Karakura Town, the weather continued to be ironically bright. He found that this was as good a time as any to relish in a few moments' peace and try to settle his nerves, so he discarded his broom into a corner of the porch of Urahara's shop. He was almost done with the sweeping, anyway.

It seemed like just yesterday that Rukia was sentenced to death, that Ichigo had infiltrated Soul Society, that he was running like a madman holding Rukia in his arms to protect her – but that was all in the past now, and there were bigger problems at hand.

Aizen. That bastard. That sneaky, conniving bastard.

It was just like him to create some huge illusion and have a grand master plan behind locked doors. He had always seemed just a bit too calm and collected about things. Renji had never been comfortable around Aizen's cool, ever-present smile. Of _course_ it was just a cover to hide his selfish desire to rule Soul Society as some sadistic, self-proclaimed god-king.

Thinking about such circumstances made relaxation much more difficult.

_Oof_.

"Oi, Renji."

Renji cracked his eyes open to glare at Rukia's silhouette, but couldn't bear the harsh rays of the sun and shut them again. Though Rukia's jarring kick to his gut had momentarily winded him, he regained his composure and eased himself upright to lean back on his hands.

"I was _trying_ to relax," he bit out, pointedly giving Rukia a look saying, _I'll get you back for that, twerp._

"Did I say otherwise?" Rukia answered flippantly, seating herself beside him at the edge of the porch. "Seems like you're skipping out on your chores again."

Renji gave her an indignant snort, "I was almost done. And it's not my fault if I get called away to duty before finishing all the extra work Urahara-san decided to grace me with. Don't you think that it's a little unfair? I have to slave around and get beaten up by children and big men alike to have a place to stay while you get to laze around in Ichigo's closet."

Rukia punched his arm and glanced at him sidelong, striking a stern pose that she must have learned from Byakuya. "Well, I'm sure I'm still more productive than you are. You make it sound as if I'm holed up in that closet all day! I most certainly am not. I've been learning the art of cooking as of late from Yuzu, though Orihime has become somewhat of a side tutor… Anyhow, you don't even do your homework!"

As Renji stared at her down the length of her arm that was currently pointing at him, he was reminded of their past relationship. Things had been different after her almost-execution, and they became somewhat as close as they used to be. The awkwardness that bridged the gap between them before was slowly ebbing away like an outgoing tide, and their habitual banter had returned. He had missed bickering with Rukia.

"_Homework_? Pah! Hell if I know how to study. I only know how to _fight_. Besides, training is the priority right now; who has time for school? It's only a cover."

Rukia smirked at her long-time friend. "You probably haven't become any stronger than before, hah! After all, you've been reduced to taking care of the dust mites around a sketchy shop."

Rukia had always known what to say to dole out a blow to his ego. And he would take it like a man—

"_What?_"

Or not.

He lunged at her like he did when they had been best friends in the academy, and she squawked while skittering out of his path. They scrabbled across the porch for a bit, with Renji reaching and Rukia avoiding, until they ran out of energy and collapsed in a heap of sore – and perhaps bruised, judging by the way Rukia had punched him in an effort to escape – limbs.

Breathing heavily on the weathered hardwood, Renji lay back while holding Rukia tightly to his chest so that she couldn't wriggle her elbow between his ribs again. The bright sun had warmed her as it had warmed the floor, and it was beginning to get a little hot while they were pressed together. In truth, Renji was reveling in the feel of Rukia's petite stature molded to his larger frame, and he didn't ever want to let go. He hoped no one would intrude and ruin the moment.

Rukia made a move to leave the circle of his arms, but the heat must have gotten to Renji's head for he left his feelings unchecked and did not release her. He would have, back then. And if not, Rukia would have struggled against him and beat her tiny fists on his chest before attempting to smash her forehead against his own or try to knee his groin – but that was then, and this was now, and she made no further movement as she went very still beneath his iron grip.

Renji raised his eyebrows in slight surprise, but he understood. Things weren't exactly the same as they used to be. _They_ weren't the same. The atmosphere was becoming a trifle stifling, and he was starting to feel a little awkward, but he was resolute and so he held her. He didn't know how to tell her anyhow, that he wished he hadn't let her go the first time and wasted all the following years pining for her attention and regretting his decision.

"Renji."

He flicked his eyes downward to give the top of her dark head a questioning glance. "Hm?"

"What are you doing?" _What are you thinking._

Renji remained silent for a bit, gathering his wits about him to try and utter something that made some coherent sense in his mind. "I…"

"Are you trying to make up for lost time?" she asked, in a hoarse voice barely above a whisper.

And that made his eyes widen, unsure of how he should respond. "Um…"

Rukia sighed in slight exasperation. "You never were very good with words."

Renji could agree to that. He was a man of action. But with Rukia… with Rukia he lost his courage, and despite his aching longing all he could do was stay silent, unable to say words or use actions to tell her how he felt.

"Say something." Her tone was neutral, but he could hear the plea in her voice.

He didn't know where to begin. "I don't know how."

Rukia struggled to lift her upper body onto her elbows, and this time his grip loosened. She raised her head to bore her eyes into his, and he felt time slowly come to a stop.

She was studying him intently, searching his face and reading him like an open book, for he never could quite hide things from her gaze. As it was, he wanted to bare his soul to her, but they hadn't elevated to the level of telepathy yet and he didn't think she could exactly read minds.

Then she started to trace his eyebrows as if she were reading them, too, and it made him part his mouth to intake a sharp gasp of air. His heart skipped a beat and then started to throb wildly, making his chest seem too small and he knew she could feel it.

She always knew how to provoke him. And oh, she provoked him in more ways than one.

He was painfully aware that she didn't love him the way he did her. She didn't know what he felt – how he felt – when he saw her, even during the time while he could only watch her from far away – she didn't know that sometimes he felt his heart was stuck in his throat and he couldn't properly breathe, or think, or speak in her presence. He wanted her to look at him with those expressive eyes of hers and tell him – or show him – that he meant as much to her as she meant to him.

But that was just one dream among many that he knew he couldn't quite achieve. And he couldn't expect her to do anything until he told her first that she was everything to him. Their separation was his fault, anyway – it was his fault. He was a coward.

Renji closed his eyes as Rukia's fingers flitted over his facial tattoos, breathing in her scent and basking in her warmth. He couldn't say anything, he couldn't – not while he felt like this, and not while he knew she wouldn't feel the same. And yet she was provoking him again, making him swallow uncomfortably as her fingers started to trace the tattoos on his neck. His chest was full to bursting and if he didn't say something now he would suffocate under her touch.

"I'm sorry," he blurted out a little breathlessly, because he knew that he owed her an apology first and foremost. He was sorry for saying what he didn't truly mean, even though it was with good intentions – he had thought that that was best; that that was what he should have said, but then he caught a glimpse of her face and he froze because he knew that he was wrong from the start. He only wanted the best for her, but that wasn't what she wanted to hear, and he couldn't forgive himself for letting things be and letting her _go_ until she forgave him first. All those years – all those stupid years were wasted because of him.

"Don't beat yourself up for it," Rukia said, knowing what he was sorry for. "I admit I was angry at first, at how after all the time we spent together, you didn't know what I wanted… at how you could say that with a smile and just expect me to nod my head and say yes, things will be fine, I'll be okay though I'll be alone, because I'll have rank and I'll be rich and I'll have a good life—"

"That's not what I meant." Renji's jaw was tense under her hands, his eyes open and bright and his brow furrowed. He was about to say more, but Rukia laid her cool fingers over his mouth and beat him to it.

She gave him a wry smile. "I know," she said, reassuring him that she didn't think him so low, "and I realized after that you were only trying to be sincerely happy for me because you thought it would be best."

He relaxed his jaw. "I didn't want to hinder you."

She sighed. "I wanted you to tell me that you would still be there. That nothing would change. That you wouldn't care if I was a Rukia or a Kuchiki Rukia."

"I didn't." _You were just my Rukia. You still are._

"No, you didn't. You didn't say that, and you didn't try to stop me from running." Her eyes were touched with a bit of lingering sadness as she looked into his. They were talking about two different didn'ts.

"I didn't care whether you were just Rukia or Kuchiki Rukia. I was always ready to be there for you when you needed me. I didn't want anything to change." He steadily held her gaze and tried to convey what he couldn't say with words. _I love you, and I wish I could undo my mistakes and take back all the years that we lost._

"You didn't tell me otherwise. I just wanted to hear it from you."

Renji's breath hitched as he contemplated her words, and it shamed him to think about how easy it could have been to avoid the bump in the road if only he'd just _said_ something.

"Would you…" his throat was thick and dry, so he had to take a moment to swallow, "would you take me back if I told you now that I'll never leave you alone again? I didn't mean—I wanted to—You don't know how much I regret—You're the only one who really _matters_ to me, and I—"

Before he could finish his halting speech, Rukia had swiftly dipped her head and lightly pressed her lips to his.

It couldn't really be called a kiss, for their lips had only touched for a fraction of a second, but it shocked Renji all the same and left a tingling sensation that he couldn't ignore. He looked at her with uncertainty, and could only say, "...What?"

Rukia rested her head on his shoulder again, hands now playing with the hairs on the nape of his neck. "It's okay."

Renji didn't know that he could fall any more in love with her, but it was evidently possible for he thought he was being engulfed in a flood of emotions. He could die happy right then and there if only she would just stay like that and do whatever she was doing to make him feel so helplessly pliant.

"I didn't think…" he couldn't bear to finish the sentence, but he _had _to ask, "Do you care for me?"

Renji waited with bated breath in hopes that she might answer yes and terrified that she might say no, not in that way, not in the way you do for me.

"You remain as daft as you were then," Rukia snipped, giving Renji pause to look confused before she lifted her head again to softly smile at him, "and still so very dense."

"What do you mean?"

"You're the one that matters most to me, too."

Renji opened his mouth, but he couldn't think of anything to say. So he stared into her large, lovely eyes and noticed that she was looking at him like she used to as a child – as if he were the only one that knew her, that _understood_ her, and he began to drown again just as he did back then.

He couldn't help what happened next even if he tried.

Straightening into a sitting position, he adjusted Rukia in his lap and slid his hands up her back to gently hold her face. He looked into her eyes briefly as if to ask for permission, but his lips lowered of their own accord before he got her answer and he kissed her – kissed her hard and kissed her thorough, as if his life depended on it and there would be no tomorrow.

When the initial shock subsided, Rukia's eyes fluttered closed and she responded as passionately as he gave. Her hands fisted in the front of his shirt before she reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck. She released his long red hair from its hair tie, and it flowed around their faces like a veil glinting of fire.

Renji ran his hands through Rukia's hair and down her sides, lifting her legs to straddle his waist. He smoothed his hands over her thighs and she made a little noise in the back of her throat, provoking him again as she pressed up against his broad chest like she couldn't get enough of his taste.

He certainly couldn't get enough of hers.

When they finally pulled away they were lying down again, and they lay there together, panting, locked in an embrace and unwilling to move away. Renji was elated that he could kiss her and she wouldn't refuse like he had been sure she would. Needless to say, she erased those doubts as if they had never existed, and he was free to love her as openly as she would let him.

Rukia took in a shuddering breath and traced Renji's collarbone. "You love me."

Renji gave her a small smile. "For the longest time. And much more than you know."

They looked at each other for a few minutes, merely indulging in the other's presence. Renji memorized every detail of her face, having been deprived of it for much too long, and even began to consider how on earth he would get Byakuya's blessing and permission to have Rukia's hand in marriage, but for now her acceptance of his love was enough. And he would wait until she told him that she loved him too; loved him just like he loved her.

...

"Um…"

"…Did you say something, Rukia?"

"…No."

Renji and Rukia both turned their heads in the direction of the newcomer, paling a little to see a timid Ururu standing in the corner of the front yard watching them apprehensively from underneath her lashes.

"_Oh_."

They were very aware that they were still in an intimate position. Rukia shoved herself out of his arms first, and they rolled away from each other until the space between could be considered appropriate.

"Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho, nice day isn't it, Ururu? Sunny and bright and wonderful! It's a little hot; don't you think? The heat must have gotten to our heads…" Rukia glared at Renji to help her with her poor excuse.

"Right, uh… we were just…"

"Getting reacquainted! It's really been too long…"

"We, uh, we used to be best friends, and—"

"For old times' sake, you know—"

"We thought we could, sort of, get to know each other again like we used to!"

"And what better way to do so than sharing an embrace and staring into each others' eyes! It's like friendly telepathy! Reading each other's minds! Of course you've got to be in close proximity for that, oh-ho-ho-ho!"

The air was heavy with an awkward silence and the heat was really getting to be unbearable. The three fidgety people stared with shifty eyes at anything that would catch their attention in order to avoid looking in the eyes of another.

"Oh, would you look at the time! I've gotta go back to the Kurosaki's! See y'all later!"

Renji could only gape with betrayal as Rukia dramatically hightailed it out of there without so much as a backward glance. Keeping in mind to get back at her later, he looked at Ururu sheepishly and gave her a nervous grin. "Uh… I wasn't skipping out on the sweeping, if that's what you're thinking…"

"Okay…" Ururu's perpetually doleful face seemed to examine his very soul.

"…"

"…"

"Uh, if you don't mind…I think I'll take my leave to go train."

* * *

One of my longer oneshots, I'm sure.

I'm not certain when I'll be updating this oneshot collection with the next, but I'm thinking of including some AU pieces, too.

-Ray.


End file.
